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Email

Original Ad (Email) / Best Buy + Bluetooth

Best Buy - "Happy 24" campaign email (original)

Spec Ad (Email) / Best Buy + Bluetooth

 

BANNER HEADLINE:
FEWER CORDS,
FEWER PROBLEMS

BANNER COPY:
Take your mobile life to the next level--
without being tied down.

SUB-HEADLINE #1:
WHAT CAN BLUETOOTH DO?

COPY:
Bluetooth is best known for making hands-free calling safe and easy, on the road or off. But this technology does so much more: jam to your favorite songs, track fitness goals, and slay the final boss--all without the wires.

BLUETOOTH [BLOO-TOOTH] (Noun) - A technology that enables two or more wireless devices to share data.

SUB-HEADLINE #2:
HOW DO I SET UP BLUETOOTH ON MY PHONE?

COPY:
It’s easier than you think! Just follow the right steps for your phone’s operating system. Then you should be ready to connect to other Bluetooth-ready devices.

SUB-HEADLINE #3:
WHAT OTHER DEVICES CONNECT THROUGH BLUETOOTH?

COPY:
Wireless speakers and headphones

Stream new podcasts, heart-thumping tunes, and the best of Pandora Internet Radio without ever sacrificing sound-quality.

Heath and fitness

Connect with smartwatches and activity trackers to record steps, count calories burned, and help you achieve your wellness goals.

 

thoughts, ideas, etc.

A lot of the language in this message from Best Buy's monthly "Happy 24" email campaign was appropriately direct and straightforward, but I thought the section headlines lacked cohesion. Additionally, I changed the dictionary-style section from passive voice to active voice and peppered in references to gaming and podcasts.